Long Days, Longer Nights

It seems the roller coaster ride is nearing its end.

We've had several near misses the last few weeks. Yesterday I called the hospice nurse and told her that something was different. Megan was very uncommunicative, had fallen a couple of times, and was generally weaker than normal. So the nurse came out. Blood pressure was hard to find; she guessed it was 70/60, but it was probably lower than that. Pulse ox seemed fine as did the heart rate. But I followed her out and asked what we should expect in the next few weeks. (I'm the type who just does better if I know whats going on before it actually goes on.) She told me that Megan probably has 1, possibly 2, weeks of coherence. Then we should expect her in a semi-conscious to unconscious state. After that, it can be days, weeks, or longer--it will just depend on how Megan's vital organs have been affected and how strong they are.

Kevin's folks are here now and were planning on going back to Arkansas on in a week; now they're not so sure. Not much use in driving back to AR only to have to come back for a service. My folks are playing it by ear to see what feels right. Everyone is trying to find "bright, happy" clothes because Megan has told me she doesn't want everyone in black and grey at her service. She wants to be able to see us from above.

This is all surreal. Who shops for new clothes for their child's funeral? I have no idea how we'll get through this...